If you’re a woman looking to spice up your masturbation game, try these techniques that don’t involve sex toys.
Masturbating can get monotonous, especially if you’re a climax queen, but it doesn’t have to be that way. Here’s the best way to masterbate female—and it doesn’t involve penetration. Start with light, feathery strokes that flutter and tease.
1. Go Slow
If you’re new to masturbation, it’s important to start slow. “You want to take your time to get comfortable, and make sure you’re in a place where no one can interrupt you,” says Finn.
She also recommends using a good amount of lube, and lighting candles or dimming the lights to create a cozy, intimate mood. Having a playlist of your favorite sexy songs, pornography, or a book on erogenous zones at the ready can help set the mood as well.
You should also experiment with different types of stimulation to find out what turns you on. Stimulating the clitoris and g-spot (the area behind the vulva that stretches down to the front of the vaginal canal) can be intensely satisfying, but there are lots of other parts of your body you can explore as well. For example, some women find rubbing their anus extremely satisfying. Stimulating the ears, inner thighs, stomach, lips, or bottoms of feet can also be very arousing. Using a vibrator, sex toy, or finger tips can also give you extra intensity when touching yourself.
2. Stimulate the Clitoris
The clitoris is a rosebud-like bump at the top of your vagina that has one of the highest concentrations of nerve endings. When it is properly stimulated, it can lead to a satisfying orgasm.
To start, rub the area with your fingers and then use a feather or other sex toy to add sensations. Then, if you feel ready, try rubbing it with a spoon (the back, not the part that goes in your mouth). Remember to always wash your hands well afterward.
As you explore different erogenous zones, experiment with pinching, tugging, and other movements. You can also try using your hands to penetrate yourself or to use your partner’s G-spot or clitoris.
Many women are more turned on by words than visuals, so consider stashing a couple of sexy books by the bed. Then, read a few chapters before you masturbate to see if this intensifies the experience for you.
3. Use Your Hands
Many women enjoy touch during masturbation, and this can lead to intense orgasms. Playing with the clitoris, massaging the nipples or even caressing the thighs can all be satisfying. There is no right or wrong way to do this, though, and it’s worth experimenting with different techniques to see what turns you on.
Use your hands to massage the erogenous zones of your body, particularly the inner and outer lips of the vagina. This area is packed with nerves, and you may find it stimulates arousal in ways that a toy can’t. Try squeezing the pubococcygeus muscles (the pelvic floor muscles you use to do Kegel exercises). This will trigger yummy tingles that will intensify with time.
Sit in front of a mirror with lube and start sliding your hands over these erogenous zones. Pinch, squeeze, pull and rub — whatever feels good, but be gentle and respectful. It’s also important to make sure your fingers are clean before touching the genitals, because bacteria can cause infections. Keeping your nails short and well-filed helps, too.
4. Try New Positions
It’s easy to fall into a masturbation routine and become stuck in the same way you do it. But it’s important to branch out and try new positions—even if that feels weird at first. It opens up more of your body for stimulation and can lead to a longer build-up to orgasm.
For instance, if you typically lie down on your back with your legs together, try spreading them out and seeing how that feels. You might find it feels even more intimate and makes your clitoral hood feel more receptive, as well as increases the amount of blood flow to your pelvic region.
Another great idea is to sit in a chair and cross your legs. That creates friction between your thighs and vulva which can be extremely pleasurable, especially if you grind against a vibrator or sex toy. You can also take this position up a level by straddling a pillow in the cowgirl style. That allows you to rock and sway in the same way that a horse would and gives you that extra boost of circulation.
5. Go With Her
Whether you’re a first-time masturbater or an old pro, there’s no right way to do it. Just be open to exploring techniques, sex toys and positions that might bring new satisfaction. And remember, masturbation isn’t just about clitoral stimulation — you can also orgasm with your legs and even your lips.
It’s important to prioritize foreplay, so don’t forget to do things like put on sexy music or pop in some audio porn before you get started. It will make your experience that much more pleasurable, plus it can help you anticipate your sex and increase excitement for the real deal.
For example, one technique Rare likes is putting her feet into it. It’s an easy, accessible position that can intensify sensations in her legs and vulva—and she also finds tightening then releasing the muscles that curl her toes intensely orgasmic. Plus, it’s an opportunity to get to know her legs and vulva a little better before taking the plunge into more adventurous masturbation positions. It’s all about finding what works for you, and if it makes you feel sexy, that’s what matters.
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